Friday, May 3, 2013

The Power of Pauses

Okay, here’s the problem, flat out: GUYS….RUSH…THEIR….WORDS!!!

Why do guys do this?
You’ll usually notice this at the Approach Stage. A guy sees a beautiful girl that he wants to approach. Before he goes over to talk to her, he has a rush of emotions, but most importantly, thoughts in his head that he wants to verbalize. He wants to make sure that he gets it all out of his system and verbalized to her, but instead of it coming out in a steady flow, it comes out rushed. The reason being is because more likely than not, he is Nervous.

It is commonly known that when people in general are nervous, they tend to speak at a faster rate than normal. It’s actually a very subtle thing to take note of, personally. I know first hand because I’ve witnessed the affects that it had on my game. Once I was aware that I was speaking to fast and that I had to forcefully & consciously slow down my speech, I began to improve the way women interacted with me.

Why is it a problem?

Yeah, you got everything out of your “chest” that you wanted to say to her, but the problem is that you said it so fast that she didn’t have time to process everything that you said. To her, it just came out as some nervous mumbo-jumbo! She truly didn’t get the message that you are trying to portray.
You have to give her time to process everything. Slow it down, give each thought room to be freely expressed and absorbed by her.

Why is it so powerful?

This is very powerful because you create a sense of suspense. The woman is clinging on to every word you say because you haven’t said it yet. Your thought hasn’t been fully expressed. It is hardwired in our heads that it’s rude to cut someone off without letting them complete their thought. She doesn’t see herself as rude so she will subconsciously investing energy, time, and focus on to your next words.

When you combine it with great eye contact, dominant/confident body language and a little flirting, you my friend have created SEXUAL TENSION.

Try it out for your self; say this line at your normal pace:

“Hi, I know this is a bit random, but I saw you walking by and I just had to stop you to say that you are beautiful.”

-now, say it with pauses:

“Hi, [pause] I know this is a bit random,[pause] but I saw you walking by [pause] and I  had to stop you [pause] just to say [pause] that you are beautiful.”

-does the last one sound sincere? Does it sound more confident? Does it sound like it’s coming from someone who is comfortable with expressing his thoughts? Does it sound sexy as hell? Yes!


1 comment:

  1. as a guy, knowing how to approach a girl is one of the most important things to know in the dating world. If you don’t know how to approach a girl or feeling shy to do this you should try this guide . . It is a really good guide written by a well know author , hope it works for you..